// API callback
related_results_labels_thumbs({"version":"1.0","encoding":"UTF-8","feed":{"xmlns":"http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom","xmlns$openSearch":"http://a9.com/-/spec/opensearchrss/1.0/","xmlns$blogger":"http://schemas.google.com/blogger/2008","xmlns$georss":"http://www.georss.org/georss","xmlns$gd":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005","xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5827968588643415787"},"updated":{"$t":"2021-01-14T04:14:02.869-06:00"},"category":[{"term":"parenting"},{"term":"feminism"},{"term":"media"},{"term":"education"},{"term":"race"},{"term":"health"},{"term":"politics"},{"term":"teaching"},{"term":"racism"},{"term":"body image"},{"term":"rhetoric"},{"term":"sexism"},{"term":"social media"},{"term":"books"},{"term":"life lessons"},{"term":"links"},{"term":"gender"},{"term":"pop culture"},{"term":"music"},{"term":"work"},{"term":"television"},{"term":"Blogging to My PhD"},{"term":"fitness"},{"term":"balancing"},{"term":"blogging"},{"term":"equality"},{"term":"gender binary"},{"term":"identity"},{"term":"motherhood"},{"term":"community college"},{"term":"movies"},{"term":"writing"},{"term":"breastfeeding"},{"term":"food"},{"term":"advertising"},{"term":"equally shared parenting"},{"term":"graduate school"},{"term":"ethical consumption"},{"term":"money"},{"term":"developmental education"},{"term":"marriage"},{"term":"pregnancy"},{"term":"housekeeping"},{"term":"rape"},{"term":"crime"},{"term":"technology"},{"term":"privilege"},{"term":"weight"},{"term":"agonism"},{"term":"biracial"},{"term":"sex"},{"term":"marketing"},{"term":"pictures"},{"term":"holidays"},{"term":"individualism\/collectivism"},{"term":"philosophy"},{"term":"academia"},{"term":"birth plans"},{"term":"body policing"},{"term":"fat-shaming"},{"term":"interracial marriage"},{"term":"news"},{"term":"clothes"},{"term":"commercials"},{"term":"toys"},{"term":"college"},{"term":"sports"},{"term":"activism"},{"term":"fatherhood"},{"term":"gay rights"},{"term":"natural childbirth"},{"term":"Relationships"},{"term":"chores"},{"term":"class"},{"term":"religion"},{"term":"society"},{"term":"birth control"},{"term":"mental health"},{"term":"rape culture"},{"term":"shopping"},{"term":"violence"},{"term":"american dream"},{"term":"beauty"},{"term":"labeling"},{"term":"roller derby"},{"term":"Identity in Balance"},{"term":"community"},{"term":"ethics"},{"term":"guns"},{"term":"reading"},{"term":"social justice"},{"term":"family"},{"term":"grammar"},{"term":"language"},{"term":"Disney"},{"term":"art"},{"term":"balance"},{"term":"children's media"},{"term":"diversity"},{"term":"guest post"},{"term":"gym"},{"term":"oppression"},{"term":"pets"},{"term":"pregnancy symptoms"},{"term":"review"},{"term":"time management"},{"term":"urban living"},{"term":"videos"},{"term":"abortion"},{"term":"attachment parenting"},{"term":"cleaning"},{"term":"free speech"},{"term":"safety"},{"term":"science"},{"term":"travel"},{"term":"visual rhetoric"},{"term":"abuse"},{"term":"athletics"},{"term":"broken ankle"},{"term":"celebrity"},{"term":"childhood"},{"term":"comedy"},{"term":"diet"},{"term":"friendship"},{"term":"labor and delivery"},{"term":"obesity"},{"term":"postmodernity"},{"term":"poverty"},{"term":"princesses"},{"term":"songs"},{"term":"Halloween"},{"term":"child care"},{"term":"cooking"},{"term":"female body"},{"term":"games"},{"term":"gun control"},{"term":"happiness"},{"term":"homeschooling"},{"term":"hospitals"},{"term":"humor"},{"term":"law"},{"term":"love"},{"term":"meditation"},{"term":"minimalism"},{"term":"new media"},{"term":"power"},{"term":"preschool"},{"term":"privacy"},{"term":"self care"},{"term":"sexual assault"},{"term":"sleep"},{"term":"st. louis"},{"term":"NaBloPoMo"},{"term":"anxiety"},{"term":"baby food"},{"term":"birth"},{"term":"choices"},{"term":"consent"},{"term":"debates"},{"term":"housing"},{"term":"magazines"},{"term":"maternity leave"},{"term":"n-word"},{"term":"orif"},{"term":"planning"},{"term":"prisons"},{"term":"running"},{"term":"sex positivity"},{"term":"teaching philosophy"},{"term":"third wave"},{"term":"truth"},{"term":"vacation"},{"term":"wealth"},{"term":"wedding"},{"term":"weight gain"},{"term":"weightlifting"},{"term":"Beyonce"},{"term":"Buffy"},{"term":"Ferguson"},{"term":"Game of Thrones"},{"term":"The Walking Dead"},{"term":"Trump"},{"term":"ableism"},{"term":"affirmative action"},{"term":"audience"},{"term":"automation"},{"term":"birth story"},{"term":"black mirror"},{"term":"cars"},{"term":"catcalling"},{"term":"civil rights"},{"term":"corporations"},{"term":"creativity"},{"term":"cute"},{"term":"daycare"},{"term":"dialects"},{"term":"dissertation"},{"term":"division of labor"},{"term":"domesticity"},{"term":"drugs"},{"term":"echo chambers"},{"term":"faith"},{"term":"football"},{"term":"free-range parenting"},{"term":"fun"},{"term":"giftedness"},{"term":"gilmore girls"},{"term":"hair"},{"term":"higher education"},{"term":"masculinity"},{"term":"meal planing"},{"term":"medical community"},{"term":"medicine"},{"term":"mindfulness"},{"term":"mom wars"},{"term":"newborn"},{"term":"poetry"},{"term":"porn"},{"term":"robots"},{"term":"shame"},{"term":"slut shaming"},{"term":"stereotype"},{"term":"stress"},{"term":"success"},{"term":"supplies"},{"term":"toddlers"},{"term":"twice exceptionality"},{"term":"voting"},{"term":"Ashton Kutcher"},{"term":"Barbie"},{"term":"Facebook"},{"term":"Joe Paterno"},{"term":"Lil Wayne"},{"term":"MilkBite"},{"term":"NFL"},{"term":"PETA"},{"term":"Parks and Rec"},{"term":"Quentin Tarantino"},{"term":"Rihanna"},{"term":"SPD"},{"term":"The Dress"},{"term":"Wordless Wednesday"},{"term":"academic freedom"},{"term":"adhd"},{"term":"adulthood"},{"term":"alcohol"},{"term":"alt\/dis"},{"term":"appropriation"},{"term":"baby gear"},{"term":"bed-sharing"},{"term":"belief"},{"term":"blog hop"},{"term":"blogiversary"},{"term":"board games"},{"term":"bullying"},{"term":"capitalism"},{"term":"career"},{"term":"censorship"},{"term":"complications"},{"term":"conferences"},{"term":"crafts"},{"term":"dating"},{"term":"democracy"},{"term":"doc"},{"term":"doubt"},{"term":"economy"},{"term":"elections"},{"term":"environment"},{"term":"epistemology"},{"term":"exercise"},{"term":"formula"},{"term":"funny"},{"term":"gestalt"},{"term":"gifts"},{"term":"girls"},{"term":"grading"},{"term":"grit"},{"term":"haes"},{"term":"history"},{"term":"humanity"},{"term":"hunting"},{"term":"injury"},{"term":"intellectualism"},{"term":"intersectionality"},{"term":"jewelry"},{"term":"lesson plans"},{"term":"lotteries"},{"term":"mayoral race"},{"term":"military"},{"term":"miscarriage"},{"term":"modernism"},{"term":"morality"},{"term":"music videos"},{"term":"names"},{"term":"nursery"},{"term":"outdoors"},{"term":"outrage"},{"term":"outsourcing"},{"term":"paleo"},{"term":"parody"},{"term":"patience"},{"term":"patriarchy"},{"term":"pink collar"},{"term":"plagiarism"},{"term":"podcasts"},{"term":"post ac"},{"term":"productivity"},{"term":"puzzles"},{"term":"recipes"},{"term":"research"},{"term":"routine"},{"term":"safe spaces"},{"term":"scholarship"},{"term":"sexual orientation"},{"term":"slavery"},{"term":"space"},{"term":"sprezzatura"},{"term":"standardization"},{"term":"sterotype"},{"term":"stigma"},{"term":"tantrums"},{"term":"teenagers"},{"term":"twitter"},{"term":"vagina"},{"term":"vegan"},{"term":"vegetarian"},{"term":"victim blaming"},{"term":"welfare"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"Balancing Jane"},"subtitle":{"type":"html","$t":"PhD student. Educator. Mother. Wife. Feminist. This blog aims to shine light on how these roles (and others) intertwine."},"link":[{"rel":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#feed","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/feeds\/posts\/default"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/-\/beauty?alt=json-in-script\u0026max-results=6"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/search\/label\/beauty"},{"rel":"hub","href":"http://pubsubhubbub.appspot.com/"},{"rel":"next","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/-\/beauty\/-\/beauty?alt=json-in-script\u0026start-index=7\u0026max-results=6"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Michelle"},"uri":{"$t":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/profile\/07801229525416203656"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$image":{"rel":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail","width":"16","height":"16","src":"https:\/\/img1.blogblog.com\/img\/b16-rounded.gif"}}],"generator":{"version":"7.00","uri":"http://www.blogger.com","$t":"Blogger"},"openSearch$totalResults":{"$t":"10"},"openSearch$startIndex":{"$t":"1"},"openSearch$itemsPerPage":{"$t":"6"},"entry":[{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5827968588643415787.post-4489820903617181743"},"published":{"$t":"2013-09-18T08:39:00.000-05:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2013-09-18T08:40:05.137-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"advertising"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"art"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"beauty"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"body image"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"feminism"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"health"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"links"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"music"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"parenting"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"racism"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"teaching"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"technology"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"work"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"The Good, the Bad, and the Curious (Link Round-Up!)"},"content":{"type":"html","$t":"Here's what I've been reading that made me smile (The Good), cry (The Bad), and think (The Curious). Feel free to add anything you've been reading\/writing in the comments!\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EThe Good\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003ECheck out this list of stereotype-busting princesses from \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.amightygirl.com\/books\/fiction\/fairy-tales-folktales\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EA Mighty Girl\u003C\/a\u003E.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003EChipotle continues to deliver beautiful, thought-provoking, and rhetorically-savvy advertising (\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/02\/what-chrysler-and-chipotle-tell-us.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ehere's my discussion\u003C\/a\u003E of their previous effort).\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"315\" src=\"\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/lUtnas5ScSE\" width=\"420\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003EHere are some \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/todayilearned.co.uk\/2013\/06\/13\/classical-sculptures-dressed-as-hipsters-look-contemporary-and-totally-badass\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Eclassic sculptures dressed up like hipsters\u003C\/a\u003E.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.facultyfocus.com\/articles\/online-education\/increase-grading-efficiency-with-a-comment-archive\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EGrading shortcuts in Microsoft Word\u003C\/a\u003E made me ridiculously excited.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/boingboing.net\/2010\/10\/05\/hunter-s-thompsons-1.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003EHunter S. Thompson.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E \u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EThe Bad\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003ESalon has a piece on \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.salon.com\/2013\/09\/18\/republican_obamacare_sabotage_will_harm_millions_of_poor_people_next_year\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ethe very real toll playing politics\u003C\/a\u003E has on millions of people's lives:\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cblockquote class=\"tr_bq\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Ci\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003EHHS expects that 56 percent of the 41.3 million eligible uninsured  people across the country will have access to affordable coverage next  year thanks to the law. But if the two dozen states still refusing to  expand their Medicaid programs decided to stop harming their residents  just to spite Obama and weaken his law, that percentage would be 78  percent.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/i\u003E \u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EThe Curious \u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.musingmomma.com\/2013\/09\/when-principles-parenting-collide-on.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EMusing Momma\u003C\/a\u003E has a great post on what happens when your principles (in this case, a belief in non-discrimination and gay rights) butts up against real-life choices (in this case, her son's deep desire to join the Boy Scouts).\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.beautyredefined.net\/physically-photoshopping-ourselves-out-of-reality\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EBeauty Redefined\u003C\/a\u003E asks us to consider whether we are physically Photoshopping ourselves out of reality:\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cblockquote class=\"tr_bq\"\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003E\u003Ci\u003EWe\u0026nbsp;can’t help but imagine how different  our world looked just a decade or two ago – not just in terms of what  women in media looked like when digital manipulation was only science  fiction – but what women in real life looked like. Cosmetic  surgery was nearly non-existent. In just the last decade, there was a  446 percent increase in cosmetic procedures (namely liposuction and  breast enhancement) in the U.S., which raked in $12 billion in 2010  alone. \u003C\/i\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.huffingtonpost.com\/elad-nehorai\/i-didnt-love-my-wife_b_3908956.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EThis Huffington Post article\u003C\/a\u003E about a man who explains that he didn't love his wife when they got married irked me in places (It's not \"helping out\"\u0026nbsp; if you're cleaning your \u003Ci\u003Eown house\u003C\/i\u003E!), but it also made some interesting points about love as an act, not a feeling:\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cblockquote class=\"tr_bq\"\u003E\u003Ci\u003ENo, love isn't an emotion or even a noun.\u0026nbsp; It's a verb.\u0026nbsp; Better defined  as giving.\u0026nbsp; As putting someone else's needs above your own. \u003C\/i\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003EI know several people who like Robin Thicke's song \"Blurred Lines\" (which I've mostly been ignoring), but reading these two pieces sent shivers down my spine as I think about the number of times I've turned off the radio when it came on in the past few weeks. \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/thesocietypages.org\/socimages\/2013\/09\/17\/from-the-mouths-of-rapists-the-lyrics-of-robin-thickes-blurred-lines-and-real-life-rape\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003ESociological Images\u003C\/a\u003E has a post juxtaposing the lyrics next to pictures of people holding up the phrases their rapists said to them. Meanwhile, this post from Labancamy Jankins voices the frustration of a man whose female friends and relatives don't seem to be the \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.labancamyjankins.com\/1\/post\/2013\/09\/blurred-lines-and-the-problematics-of-robin-thicke-white-male-privilege-and-female-relatives.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Eracist and sexist history repeating itself\u003C\/a\u003E through this song.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EAs I've talked about here before, I'm really interested in the generational divide in workplace expectations and general life goals. Two recent articles (one a response to the other) are discussing Gen Y's expectations and realities. This \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.huffingtonpost.com\/wait-but-why\/generation-y-unhappy_b_3930620.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Estick-figure illustrated call to hard work\u003C\/a\u003E is making the internet rounds. And \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/aweinstein.kinja.com\/fuck-you-im-gen-y-and-i-dont-feel-special-or-entitl-1333588443\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ethis response to it\u003C\/a\u003E with the grim realities of actual lives is worth a read, too."},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/feeds\/4489820903617181743\/comments\/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/09\/the-good-bad-and-curious-link-round-up.html#comment-form","title":"2 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/4489820903617181743"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/4489820903617181743"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/09\/the-good-bad-and-curious-link-round-up.html","title":"The Good, the Bad, and the Curious (Link Round-Up!)"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Michelle"},"uri":{"$t":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/profile\/07801229525416203656"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$image":{"rel":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail","width":"16","height":"16","src":"https:\/\/img1.blogblog.com\/img\/b16-rounded.gif"}}],"thr$total":{"$t":"2"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5827968588643415787.post-7215316169431825076"},"published":{"$t":"2013-05-26T07:56:00.000-05:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2013-05-26T07:58:14.599-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"beauty"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"biracial"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"body image"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"food"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"health"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"The Good, the Bad, and the Curious (Links!)"},"content":{"type":"html","$t":"For all of you in academia out there, happy summer break! I hope it is full of relaxation, sunshine, and fun. Mine is full of teaching summer classes and studying for PhD exams, but I foresee some sun and fun as well, so I'm happy.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EHere's what I've been reading lately that made me smile (The Good), cry (The Bad), and think (The Curious). Please add anything you've been reading (or writing) in the comments!\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EThe Good\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003EHere is a baby elephant playing in the ocean. What more do you need in life?\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe frameborder=\"0\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/video\/embed?video_id=111168559090525\" width=\"400\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003EThis victim of the Oklahoma tornadoes finds her dog under the debris while doing a news interview.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"315\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/OdHagKeo86k\" width=\"560\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003EThis woman \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.themilitantbaker.com\/2013\/05\/to-mike-jeffries-co-abercrombie-fitch.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ewrote a wonderful letter and posed for a gorgeous photo shoot\u003C\/a\u003E to demonstrate to Abercrombie and Fitch CEO that her plus-size body can still fit in his clothes and that she looks damn good while doing it.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EThe Bad\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/ecosalon.com\/that-happened-the-princess-and-the-tramp\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EThis EcoSalon article\u003C\/a\u003E takes on the Merida makeover and talks about what we mean when we say raising boys is easier than raising girls.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.salon.com\/2013\/05\/25\/diet_soda_rots_your_teeth_like_meth_and_cocaine_partner\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EDiet soda can rot your teeth as badly as meth\u003C\/a\u003E?\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EI have some friends who read this story from the \"better safe than sorry camp,\" but I would be so, so, so \u0026nbsp;mad if someone called the police on me for \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/gawker.com\/va-dad-accused-of-kidnapping-because-his-mixed-race-kid-509742126\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ekidnapping my daughter just because her skin is darker\u003C\/a\u003E than mine.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EThe Curious\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003ETurns out that Dove's \"you're more beautiful than you think\" campaign is not only problematic when it comes to how we privilege beauty, \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/gawker.com\/dove-lied-to-you-youre-not-that-pretty-after-all-509098854\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Eit's also untrue\u003C\/a\u003E.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EWhite Mom Blog (who I recently discovered, and who you should add to your blogroll immediately) \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/whitemomblog.com\/2013\/05\/22\/open-letter-to-100-days-of-real-food\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ewrites about her experience\u003C\/a\u003E with 100 Days of Real Food (another blog I follow and enjoy). Her Facebook comments calling the privilege involved in judging other parents' food choices was deleted and got her banned. I am all about increasing the access to healthy food, but denying privilege and ignoring race and class isn't going to get us there.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EHuffington Post took some guesses at \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.huffingtonpost.com\/2013\/02\/12\/who-makes-trader-joes-food_n_2664899.html#slide=more280244\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ewhat major brands\u003C\/a\u003E are secretly hiding behind Trader Joe's labels.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EOur society is so obsessed with eliminating fat that we start when people are infants. This is why \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/parenting.blogs.nytimes.com\/2013\/05\/22\/not-worried-about-a-little-baby-fat\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ebody-positive parenting\u003C\/a\u003E has to start young.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/gokaleo.com\/2013\/05\/20\/i-am-overweight\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EThis woman demonstrates\u003C\/a\u003E how the weight she feels is healthiest on her body is still considered overweight by the BMI charts. What are we really doing to ourselves when we make size the only measure of health?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EAnd seriously, \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/kmosullivan.com\/2013\/05\/20\/angelina-danica-breasts-and-the-power-of-choice\/comment-page-1\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ewhat is it about boobs\u003C\/a\u003E?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThere's a caped thong-wearing man on a motorcycle in Wisconsin, and\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/gawker.com\/thong-cape-scooter-man-disturbs-children-but-hes-p-509855696\" target=\"_blank\"\u003E he is free to ride on\u003C\/a\u003E.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E"},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/feeds\/7215316169431825076\/comments\/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/05\/the-good-bad-and-curious-links.html#comment-form","title":"1 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/7215316169431825076"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/7215316169431825076"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/05\/the-good-bad-and-curious-links.html","title":"The Good, the Bad, and the Curious (Links!)"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Michelle"},"uri":{"$t":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/profile\/07801229525416203656"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$image":{"rel":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail","width":"16","height":"16","src":"https:\/\/img1.blogblog.com\/img\/b16-rounded.gif"}}],"media$thumbnail":{"xmlns$media":"http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/","url":"https:\/\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/OdHagKeo86k\/default.jpg","height":"72","width":"72"},"thr$total":{"$t":"1"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5827968588643415787.post-4646219473714341698"},"published":{"$t":"2013-04-21T17:12:00.000-05:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2013-04-21T17:12:42.542-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"advertising"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"beauty"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"body image"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"feminism"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"marketing"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"The Advertising Industry and Beauty Norms: Further Reflections on Dove's Sketches"},"content":{"type":"html","$t":"Last week, I watched the Dove Sketches commercial and I (like many of my friends and acquaintances) was positively impacted by the message that I am more beautiful than I think. I then did some thinking about it and realized that it was still sending a message about beauty being the primary goal, which can be a problem. Trying to reconcile my own liking of the video with this problematic message, I wrote a somewhat convoluted post about \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/04\/should-beauty-be-goal.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ethe definition of beauty\u003C\/a\u003E. Ultimately, I think I was working too hard to jump through hoops to justify liking the video.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003ESince then, I've read a lot about this campaign. \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/jazzylittledrops.tumblr.com\/post\/48118645174\/why-doves-real-beauty-sketches-video-makes-me\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EThis post from Little Drops \u003C\/a\u003Edoes an excellent job of demonstrating the problems with the video. It not only reinforces \"beauty\" as the goal, it reinforces a very narrow standard of beauty by focusing on whiteness and thinness. I saw \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=FpWkZiZaQsA\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ethe parody video\u003C\/a\u003E. I read the objections and the\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/reappropriate.co\/?p=3189\" target=\"_blank\"\u003E defenses \u003C\/a\u003Eand I did some thinking.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThen, when I wasn't actively thinking about it at all, something happened that made me think about it in yet another way.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EI haven't had cable or satellite for almost two years. This has meant that my exposure to commercials has been cut \u003Ci\u003Eway \u003C\/i\u003Edown. Last week, though, I gave in to ATT and got U-Verse. Today I was cleaning my living room and watching a \u003Ci\u003ERoseanne\u003C\/i\u003E\u0026nbsp;marathon.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Ci\u003ERoseanne \u003C\/i\u003Eis a show that is known for pushing the envelope. It dared to show a woman who wasn't a perfect mother, who was working class, and whose body didn't fit the narrow definitions of beauty standards. In the episode I was watching, Roseanne dared to refer to her own body as beautiful and \"hot\" multiple times. Sure, she was playing up the societal discord for laughs, but she was also displaying confidence and empowerment. \u003Ci\u003ERoseanne\u003C\/i\u003E\u0026nbsp;is a show (even two decades later) that challenges our norms.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EIn the midst of this show, I was given these two ads back to back. One is for Jenny Craig and features a woman who cries because she only has one picture of herself since her child was born. She says that now that she's lost 30 pounds she is willing to be in the pictures of her own life again.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"323\" nbsp=\"\" scrolling=\"no\" src=\"http:\/\/www.ispot.tv\/share\/7IQh\" width=\"500\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EWhile looking for the clip online, I found another clip of the same woman explaining that she now sees herself as \"beautiful,\" something she \"never\" would have said before losing the weight.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"315\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/PQSkO3A-1qw\" width=\"420\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EImmediately following this ad, I was displayed a commercial for Greek yogurt that features a complete stranger berating a mother for sacrificing her own appearance to be a better parent. The stranger mocks her hair and tells her that she can at least have good yogurt without sacrifices.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"323\" nbsp=\"\" scrolling=\"no\" src=\"http:\/\/www.ispot.tv\/share\/7oil\" width=\"500\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003EIt's no coincidence that these ads are both aimed at middle-aged mothers. They ran during \u003Ci\u003ERoseanne\u003C\/i\u003E, and they were preying on that particular demographic.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003EIt doesn't take nearly as much analysis to unpack the messages in these ads. You are flawed. Fix yourself. Lose the weight so that you can be worthy of being in the pictures of your own life because right now you're hideous and right to hide from the camera. The marketing strategy is dependent upon making us feel bad about ourselves so that we will throw money at the gaping hole in our self-reflection that ads like this spend their time carving out of us.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003ESince it had been so long since I'd seen an ad on TV, it was easy for me to view the Dove ads in something of a vacuum. Once I remembered the context in which they were airing, though, I had to rethink my stance a little.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003ELook, there has been a lot of speculation about whether the marketers at Dove are sincere about their desire to make women feel better about themselves. Chief among these concerns is the evidence that the company that owns Dove, Unilever, \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/jezebel.com\/310320\/dove-vs-axe-is-unilever-hypocritical\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ealso owns AXE\u003C\/a\u003E, and those commercials are basically cesspools of misogyny.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EIn my mind, there is no speculation. I have absolutely no belief that whoever greenlighted and funded the Dove campaign gives a damn whether I feel good about myself or not. The company cares about what all companies care about: making money.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EDove, though, is making a bet that they don't have to make women feel horrible about their own bodies in order to turn a profit. Dove is betting that we're pretty fed up with being told day in and day out that our skin, hair, eyes, teeth, nails, and eyelashes are flawed. Dove is hoping that people are sick of the way that the beauty industry assumes that it doesn't matter how horrible it treats us, that--in fact--the worse it treats us the more money we will throw at it to make it go away. Dove is hoping that we're a little bit smarter than that, that we're opening our eyes, that we aren't going to accept that marketing strategy forever.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003ESo, is Dove still trying to focus on physical beauty? Of course they are. They sell beauty products. Is Dove giving in to an image of beauty that is narrowly constructed with all kinds of privilege built in? Of course they are. They sell beauty products in America.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EI am not excusing the problematic aspects of Dove's ad. I am not saying that we shouldn't be talking about those things or that Dove doesn't have a responsibility to its consumers to do a better job.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EI am saying, though, that what Dove is doing isn't heartening because of what it says about Dove. What Dove is doing is heartening because of what it says about \u003Ci\u003Eus\u003C\/i\u003E. Dove is pouring money into these campaigns because they think it will pay off in the long run, and they think it will pay off in the long run because they've heard us saying that we're sick of being treated like mannequins for products instead of human beings with lives. They've seen things like the #KeepItReal campaign (\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/06\/keepitreal-are-magazines-here-for-us-or.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ewhich I wrote about before\u003C\/a\u003E) and the \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.sparksummit.com\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003ESPARK Movement\u003C\/a\u003E. They've seen the power of social media in breaking through previously impervious marketing lies, and they are making a bet on the future.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EWhat's really great about Dove is that it shows that companies can listen. They might not get it 100% right, but it's a lot better than 100% wrong. \u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E"},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/feeds\/4646219473714341698\/comments\/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/04\/the-advertising-industry-and-beauty.html#comment-form","title":"0 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/4646219473714341698"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/4646219473714341698"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/04\/the-advertising-industry-and-beauty.html","title":"The Advertising Industry and Beauty Norms: Further Reflections on Dove's Sketches"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Michelle"},"uri":{"$t":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/profile\/07801229525416203656"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$image":{"rel":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail","width":"16","height":"16","src":"https:\/\/img1.blogblog.com\/img\/b16-rounded.gif"}}],"media$thumbnail":{"xmlns$media":"http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/","url":"https:\/\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/PQSkO3A-1qw\/default.jpg","height":"72","width":"72"},"thr$total":{"$t":"0"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5827968588643415787.post-2782483116201430454"},"published":{"$t":"2013-04-16T11:40:00.000-05:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2013-04-16T11:40:54.727-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"advertising"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"beauty"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"body image"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"Should Beauty Be the Goal?"},"content":{"type":"html","$t":"\u003Cdiv class=\"tr_bq\" style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003EDove has released a new campaign project that is going viral.\u0026nbsp; \u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"315\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/XpaOjMXyJGk\" width=\"560\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003EIn the video, a forensic artist asks people to describe their own faces as he sketches them. Then he asks someone who met the person for the project to describe their companion. He then shows the two sketches (the way we see ourselves and the way others see us) to the participants. It pretty powerfully demonstrates that we are much harsher on ourselves than the world around us. It ends with the phrase \"you are more beautiful than you think.\"\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003EI noticed that one of the YouTube comments has been collapsed for receiving so many downvotes. This commenter had this to say:\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Ci\u003Ethis is bullshit. its okay to be ugly, that should be the message, not that your self-perception of your own beauty is false. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003Eand what that woman said, that she should be more grateful for her natural beauty, because it effects all her choices? that's not a good beauty image. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003Eyou're allowed to be ugly and it should not hinder to achieve any of your goals in life.\u003C\/i\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003EObviously, her response is not being received well by the doting public that is responding to this video with overwhelming positivity. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EHer response made me think about a recent post from \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/anytimeyoga.wordpress.com\/2013\/03\/21\/all-bodies-are-beautiful\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003ETori at Anytime Yoga\u003C\/a\u003E. In that post, Tori said:\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Ci\u003ESometimes I think of my body as beautiful; a lot of times I do not. And I am okay with both of those. Moreover, whether or not people perceive me as beautiful does not matter in terms of how I fundamentally expect they should treat me. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003ERegardless of whether I am beautiful, I expect that I should be able to find clothing appropriate to my body and daily activities. Regardless of whether I am beautiful, I expect that I should be able to walk or run down the street or in a store without someone insinuating or flat out stating that my appearance is embarrassing, offensive, or that I need to cover up.\u003C\/i\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\u003Cu\u003E\u003Cb\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EIs Beauty a Moral Imperative?\u003C\/span\u003E \u003C\/b\u003E\u003C\/u\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EI completely agree with Tori's point. Beauty is not a moral imperative. You do not have to be beautiful to deserve respect as a human being. Both Tori and the YouTube commenter are getting at the same point: do you have to see \u003Ci\u003Eyourself\u003C\/i\u003E as beautiful in order to reach your life goals? Should seeing yourself as beautiful be a precursor to those goals?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThe Dove campaign certainly thinks so. They think that seeing ourselves as ugly is holding us back. They tell us to focus on the parts of ourselves that we like.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EYet, the message is ultimately still one that focuses on beauty. At the end of the day, we're still concerned with whether or not we are beautiful before we can be concerned with anything else. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EI completely respect the stance that beauty shouldn't enter into the equation at all. I wish that I lived in a world where it didn't matter how I saw myself or how I thought others perceived me. That world, though, is so far from my current reality that I can't ignore the work that messages like this Dove campaign are doing. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cb\u003E\u003Cu\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EDefining Beauty\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/u\u003E\u003C\/b\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EI am conflicted. Being the language nerd that I am, I (of course) turn to the Oxford English Dictionary when I am conflicted. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThe OED has this to say on beauty:\u003Ci\u003E\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/i\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cblockquote class=\"tr_bq\"\u003E1. \u003Ci\u003ESuch combined perfection of form and charm of colouring as affords keen pleasure to the sense of sight\u003C\/i\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\u003Cblockquote class=\"tr_bq\"\u003E2. \u003Ci\u003EThat quality or combination of qualities which affords keen pleasure to other senses (e.g. that of hearing), or which charms the intellectual or moral faculties, through inherent grace, or fitness to a desired end\u003C\/i\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\u003Cblockquote class=\"tr_bq\"\u003E3.\u003Ci\u003E The prevailing fashion or standard of the beautiful.\u003C\/i\u003E (Now obscure)\u003C\/blockquote\u003EThere are more, but I think that these three do a good job of demonstrating the tension in our discussion of whether \"beauty\" should be our goal.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cu\u003E\u003Cb\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003ETo Look Beautiful\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/b\u003E\u003C\/u\u003E \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EFor the most part, we define beauty today in that first way. It means to be pleasant to the sense of sight. You are beautiful when your appearance is pleasing, either to yourself or other people. That's why we say that beauty is in the \u003Ci\u003Eeye\u003C\/i\u003E of the beholder. It's the visual that matters. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/lo9883\/144506169\/\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" title=\"What's in my makeup bag by lo83, on Flickr\"\u003E\u003Cimg alt=\"What's in my makeup bag\" height=\"435\" src=\"http:\/\/farm1.staticflickr.com\/53\/144506169_0378b78a9f.jpg\" width=\"500\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EWe can see why this could be a problematic goal. All of that focus on appearance gives the beauty industry the motivation to provide us with a series of \"problems\" we need to \"fix.\" We need the right tweezers to remove the hair from our brows and the right gel to remove the hair from our upper lips. We need the right underwear to ensure there are no bulges in our middles and to ensure there are the proper bulges in our breasts. We need to be bleached, slathered, scented, and polished. We need our eyelashes lengthened and our teeth whitened. We need our wrinkles smoothed, our hair dyed, and our muscles toned. If we \"fix\" all of those \"problems,\" the industry will be ready with some more. As long as there are products that can be hocked to fill in the gap, we will be flawed. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThis is a problem that disproportionately effects women. \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.marieclaire.co.uk\/news\/beauty\/165007\/women-spend-three-years-getting-ready.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003EOne study \u003C\/a\u003Efound that women spend an average of \u003Ci\u003Ethree years\u003C\/i\u003E getting ready. Another study suggests that the gender gap is closing, but not in the way we'd hope. Now \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.dailymail.co.uk\/femail\/article-1249709\/Rise-metrosexual-Men-spend-longer-getting-ready-women.html\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Ewe're all wasting too much time\u003C\/a\u003E making ourselves physically acceptable by constantly shifting standards. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThe Dove video certainly focused on those self-perceived flaws. People talked about the roundness of their faces and the jutting of their chins with venom. We can be cruel to ourselves.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003E\u003Cu\u003E\u003Cb\u003EOther Ways to Be Beautiful\u003C\/b\u003E\u003C\/u\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EBut let's take a second and look at that second definition of beauty. Here it is not just visual pleasure, but \"keen pleasure to the other senses\" and that \"which charms the intellectual or moral faculties.\" We don't have to just look pleasing to be beautiful, then. We can be beautiful because we have a lovely singing voice or because we are great conversationalists or because we bring joy to those around us. Beauty is not just about how we look. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EIf you listen carefully to the participants in the Dove campaign, you'll hear much of this shift taking place. The people who are asked to describe their new acquaintance's face often focus on things that aren't just purely visually pleasing. They talk about people having \"nice eyes\" that \"lit up\" when they spoke. When people looked at their own pictures, they described the ones designed by strangers to be more \"open\" and friendly. In other words, they weren't just focusing on how they looked but also on how they interacted with the world around them.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Ctable align=\"center\" cellpadding=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" class=\"tr-caption-container\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ctbody\u003E\u003Ctr\u003E\u003Ctd style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/-trr6mIJTpsU\/UW1-PpcGSSI\/AAAAAAAACSc\/WoleB0WEMuY\/s1600\/553049_367688850015433_1497580727_n.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"\u003E\u003Cimg border=\"0\" height=\"320\" src=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/-trr6mIJTpsU\/UW1-PpcGSSI\/AAAAAAAACSc\/WoleB0WEMuY\/s320\/553049_367688850015433_1497580727_n.jpg\" width=\"320\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/td\u003E\u003C\/tr\u003E\u003Ctr\u003E\u003Ctd class=\"tr-caption\" style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003EThat haircut is not going to last, but the impact you have on the world just might.\u003C\/td\u003E\u003C\/tr\u003E\u003C\/tbody\u003E\u003C\/table\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cu\u003E\u003Cb\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EPhysical Beauty is Fickle\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/b\u003E\u003C\/u\u003E \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThis brings me to the third definition. The now defunct idea that \"beauty\" means the \"prevailing fashion\" demonstrates the old adage that \"beauty is in the eye of the beholder.\" In many ways, the definition of beauty (especially physical beauty) is going to continue to shift over time. We will never reach it because it is not an attainable end point but a shifting (and subjective) standard.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EIf beauty is seen more in that second way, though, there are a lot more stable things we can strive for that are tied up in its conceptualization. If being a \"beautiful\" person means being someone who brings pleasure and joy to the world around us, the goal becomes less about plucking, bleaching, scrubbing, and slicing our bodies into the narrow standard of acceptability and more about examining how our contributions to the world impact those around us. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThe Dove campaign tells us that we are more beautiful than we think not because there \u003Ci\u003Earen't \u003C\/i\u003Ebags under our eyes or because there \u003Ci\u003Eisn't\u003C\/i\u003E grey in our hair, but because those things don't matter very much to that more pervasive, powerful understanding of beauty. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cb\u003E\u003Cu\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EWe Have the Right to Look Ugly, but Do We Have the Right to \"Act Ugly\"?\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/u\u003E\u003C\/b\u003E \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThat YouTube commenter is right. We have the right to be physically \"ugly\" and still be treated with dignity and respect. But there is more than one way to be ugly, and I'm reminded of my mother telling me to not \"act ugly\" as a child. To act ugly was to be unkind or snotty. To act ugly was to not extend the dignity and respect to others that I myself deserved. \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EI don't think we have a moral imperative to be physically beautiful, but what about our responsibility to be beautiful in our interactions with the world around us? Dove says that they are \"committed to creating a world where beauty is a source of confidence, not anxiety.\" If that's true, could this video and their concept in general be used to show us what striving for a broader beauty really means?\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cspan style=\"font-size: x-small;\"\u003EPhoto: \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/lo9883\/144506169\/\" target=\"_blank\"\u003Elo83\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E"},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/feeds\/2782483116201430454\/comments\/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/04\/should-beauty-be-goal.html#comment-form","title":"2 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/2782483116201430454"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/2782483116201430454"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2013\/04\/should-beauty-be-goal.html","title":"Should Beauty Be the Goal?"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Michelle"},"uri":{"$t":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/profile\/07801229525416203656"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$image":{"rel":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail","width":"16","height":"16","src":"https:\/\/img1.blogblog.com\/img\/b16-rounded.gif"}}],"media$thumbnail":{"xmlns$media":"http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/","url":"https:\/\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/XpaOjMXyJGk\/default.jpg","height":"72","width":"72"},"thr$total":{"$t":"2"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5827968588643415787.post-3776003636676280001"},"published":{"$t":"2012-11-20T10:51:00.001-06:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2012-11-20T11:06:36.895-06:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"beauty"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"body image"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"parenting"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"pictures"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"I Can't Hate My Chin Anymore"},"content":{"type":"html","$t":"\u003Cdiv class=\"tr_bq\"\u003EThere have been several posts about parenting and beauty that have really resonated with me lately. This beautiful \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/offbeatmama.com\/2012\/11\/telling-daughters-im-beautiful\"\u003EOffbeat Mama post\u003C\/a\u003E has a mom explaining why she pushes her own bodily insecurities aside for the sake of her daughters:\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cblockquote\u003E\u003Ci\u003EI don't want my girls to be children who are perfect and then, when they start to feel like women, they remember how I thought of myself as ugly and so they will be ugly too. They will get older and their breasts will lose their shape and they will hate their bodies, because that's what women do. That's what mommy did. I want them to become women who remember me modeling impossible beauty. Modeling beauty in the face of a mean world, a scary world, a world where we don't know what to make of ourselves.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\"Look at me, girls!\" I say to them. \"Look at how beautiful I am. I feel really beautiful, today.\"\u003C\/i\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003EThen there was \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.huffingtonpost.com\/allison-tate\/mom-pictures-with-kids_b_1926073.html\"\u003EAllison Tate's essay\u003C\/a\u003E about choosing to stay in the picture even when she wasn't looking her \"best.\" \u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cblockquote class=\"tr_bq\"\u003E\u003Ci\u003EI'm everywhere in their young lives, and yet I have very few pictures of me with them. Someday I won't be here -- and I don't know if that someday is tomorrow or thirty or forty or fifty years from now -- but I want them to have pictures of me. I want them to see the way I looked at them, see how much I loved them. I am not perfect to look at and I am not perfect to love, but I am perfectly their mother.\u003C\/i\u003E\u003C\/blockquote\u003EI've fought through my own body image demons in my day, but the one that was hardest to slay was my loathing for my own chin. I know that sounds silly. It \u003Ci\u003Eis\u003C\/i\u003E\u0026nbsp;silly. It's ridiculous, but it's also true.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EWhenever I saw a picture of myself, I would hone in on my chin and criticize it. That's what I saw when I looked at myself: a flaw, a marred feature, an ugliness.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EThen, there were a couple of pictures that stopped me dead in my tracks:\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-xVIdqckoEWE\/UKuxy1NAwZI\/AAAAAAAABjw\/kMVs35FeOAM\/s1600\/65456_624239677091_6663798_n.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg border=\"0\" height=\"240\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-xVIdqckoEWE\/UKuxy1NAwZI\/AAAAAAAABjw\/kMVs35FeOAM\/s320\/65456_624239677091_6663798_n.jpg\" width=\"320\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-BHflLwunFio\/UKux0yXqoYI\/AAAAAAAABj4\/1dHJmPDGj0k\/s1600\/167734_633454859791_4496280_n.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg border=\"0\" height=\"240\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-BHflLwunFio\/UKux0yXqoYI\/AAAAAAAABj4\/1dHJmPDGj0k\/s320\/167734_633454859791_4496280_n.jpg\" width=\"320\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EThat chin, the one I had spent so much time hating and singling out as a flaw, had shown up in the most unexpected of places: on my daughter's absolutely perfect face.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EAs she's grown older, it's quite clearly kept the genetic predisposition, and it's gotten no less gorgeous.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-6orzeOF3QSE\/UKuyh0qIldI\/AAAAAAAABkA\/vi7tF235L6M\/s1600\/20392_983372237561_2070368080_n.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg border=\"0\" height=\"320\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-6orzeOF3QSE\/UKuyh0qIldI\/AAAAAAAABkA\/vi7tF235L6M\/s320\/20392_983372237561_2070368080_n.jpg\" width=\"238\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-gVZeAP3QncE\/UKuyi6mTpGI\/AAAAAAAABkI\/Wx2WZRVnMmQ\/s1600\/297188_968410411181_1185612874_n.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg border=\"0\" height=\"320\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-gVZeAP3QncE\/UKuyi6mTpGI\/AAAAAAAABkI\/Wx2WZRVnMmQ\/s320\/297188_968410411181_1185612874_n.jpg\" width=\"239\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EI couldn't hate my chin anymore. Every time I looked at a picture of myself, I no longer saw that ugliness. I saw a piece of my daughter's beauty, and I remembered that any criticism I gave of my own \"flaw\" would be a criticism of hers. So what could I do instead? Could I look at a picture of myself and single out something else as a flaw. Could I decide that I weighed too much? Could I dislike my haircut? Could I wish those bags under my eyes would disappear?\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EOf course I could (and, admittedly, sometimes I do). But someday my daughter may think she weighs too much. She could dislike her haircut. She could have bags under her eyes, too. These things are just scapegoats for a more generalized insecurity, a more amorphous belief that we do not meet the standard--whatever that is.\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EThe things that I say about my body are things that she's going to learn to say about her body. Every flaw I see in myself is a flaw I am teaching her to see in herself. Every cruel remark I make against my body is a cruel remark she learns to use against her own.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EAnd she is beautiful. She is gorgeous. She is amazing.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003ESo that she can remain that way, I must be, too. Have I mentioned to you how awesome my chin is?\u003C\/div\u003E"},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/feeds\/3776003636676280001\/comments\/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/11\/i-cant-hate-my-chin-anymore.html#comment-form","title":"11 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/3776003636676280001"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/3776003636676280001"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/11\/i-cant-hate-my-chin-anymore.html","title":"I Can't Hate My Chin Anymore"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Michelle"},"uri":{"$t":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/profile\/07801229525416203656"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$image":{"rel":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail","width":"16","height":"16","src":"https:\/\/img1.blogblog.com\/img\/b16-rounded.gif"}}],"media$thumbnail":{"xmlns$media":"http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/","url":"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-xVIdqckoEWE\/UKuxy1NAwZI\/AAAAAAAABjw\/kMVs35FeOAM\/s72-c\/65456_624239677091_6663798_n.jpg","height":"72","width":"72"},"thr$total":{"$t":"11"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5827968588643415787.post-1800438148132901104"},"published":{"$t":"2012-07-27T17:56:00.001-05:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2012-07-27T17:56:39.044-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"advertising"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"american dream"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"beauty"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"body image"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"money"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"travel"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"Money Can't Buy Happiness: Let's Talk About Money (Part 5)"},"content":{"type":"html","$t":"This week has been all about the paradox of money and the American Dream mythos. We started out in \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/07\/lets-talk-about-money-oh-okay-and.html\"\u003EPart 1\u003C\/a\u003E by looking at why we hold financial success up as the goal, but then vilify some who reach it. \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/07\/a-fine-line-between-criminal-and.html\"\u003EPart 2\u003C\/a\u003E used \u003Ci\u003EAmerican Gangster \u003C\/i\u003Eand \u003Ci\u003EFear and Loathing in Las Vegas \u003C\/i\u003Eto look at the fine line between criminality and innovation. \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/07\/rags-to-riches-has-to-start-with-rags.html\"\u003EPart 3\u003C\/a\u003E took Jay-Z and Kanye West's use of American Dream rhetoric to examine the rags-to-riches phenomenon. \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/07\/lotteries-and-american-dream-lets-talk.html\"\u003EPart 4\u003C\/a\u003E looked at what happens when we try to divorce the hard work part away from the success part, especially by playing the lottery.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003EToday we're going to look at the tension between happiness and money, especially the way that we're fed conflicting messages about how the two intertwine.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E  \u003Cspan class=\"Apple-style-span\" style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EMoney Can't Buy Happiness\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EWe've all heard the phrase \"money can't buy happiness.\" And we've all seen the clever plays on this idea that suggest it's just something poor people say to make themselves feel better.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ctable align=\"center\" cellpadding=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" class=\"tr-caption-container\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ctbody\u003E\u003Ctr\u003E\u003Ctd style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-l6f2sUWqlYA\/UBKWsdBJCVI\/AAAAAAAAA34\/wjdxHvbdFK0\/s1600\/money_cant_buy_happiness_tshirt-p235796837388370679bfn6a_400.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"\u003E\u003Cimg alt=\"t-shirt that says \u0026quot;money can't buy happiness, but then again have you ever seen an unhappy person on a jet ski?\u0026quot;\" border=\"0\" height=\"320\" src=\"http:\/\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-l6f2sUWqlYA\/UBKWsdBJCVI\/AAAAAAAAA34\/wjdxHvbdFK0\/s320\/money_cant_buy_happiness_tshirt-p235796837388370679bfn6a_400.jpg\" title=\"tshirt\" width=\"320\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/td\u003E\u003C\/tr\u003E\u003Ctr\u003E\u003Ctd class=\"tr-caption\" style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003EFrom \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.zazzle.com\/money_cant_buy_happiness_t_shirt-235796837388370679\"\u003EZazzle\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/td\u003E\u003C\/tr\u003E\u003C\/tbody\u003E\u003C\/table\u003EBut, in less sarcastic realms, we also focus on how \"the best things in life are free,\" and we talk about how you can't put a price tag on things like friendship, love, and beauty.\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EThe conflict comes when the corporate nature of the culture we live in then turns around and starts putting a price tag on friendship, love, and beauty.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EThis conflict runs deep. There are studies that suggest you can't buy happiness, like \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/news.yahoo.com\/money-really-cant-buy-happiness-study-finds-210609941.html\"\u003Ethis recent one\u003C\/a\u003E that suggests happiness is tied to respect more than wealth. Then there are studies suggesting the opposite, like this one that says money can buy happiness\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.huffingtonpost.com\/2012\/05\/01\/money-can-buy-happiness_n_1467789.html\"\u003E if you spend it on other people\u003C\/a\u003E. Most interesting to me is this study, which found that happiness rises right along with income--\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/blogs.wsj.com\/wealth\/2010\/09\/07\/the-perfect-salary-for-happiness-75000-a-year\/\"\u003Eup to $75,000\u003C\/a\u003E. After that, \"it is just more stuff with no gain in happiness.\" And that makes some sense, right? After all, if you are living without the ability to pay for basic elements of security (housing, food, heat, clothes), then that's very likely going to impact your happiness. At the same time, a certain level of luxury spending (going to the movies, eating out, etc.) is likely to impact it as well. But at some point, you're not going to be able to get more bang for your buck, so to speak.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EThe fact that there are even studies about this at all, though, suggests that we've noticed the conflict in our cultural mythos, and that conflict comes largely from the drastically different messages we receive.\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EOn one hand, appreciating the qualities in life that can't be bought is seen as virtuous and important to enlightened living. On the other hand, doing that does just the opposite of what we talked about in Part 4 (where we divorced hard work from success through lotteries). When we say that happiness can be found without economic success, we also disrupt the American Dream (and the work ethic and potentially discrimination-erasing (read, ignoring) aspects of it that we've come to depend on).\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EIf we change the definition of success, we also risk changing the definition of hard work. Suddenly, there are a lot fewer people willing to slug away at jobs they hate if the carrot at the end of the stick has been moved.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E \u003Cspan class=\"Apple-style-span\" style=\"color: orange;\"\u003ECorporations, Money, and Happiness\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EBut that's not an easy carrot to move. For every time we see \"The best things in life are free\" cross-stitched into a doily, we're also seeing hundreds and hundreds of ads that send the exact opposite message.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EThere are ads that tell us \u003Cb\u003Emoney can buy beauty\u003C\/b\u003E, specifically, our own beauty:\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-KyYIiAVIAR0\/UBMJwxSf8MI\/AAAAAAAAA4c\/0DTKYlXVJnE\/s1600\/c1f21a015cbb56b1_dianekruger_ckbeauty_ad_1.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg alt=\"calvin klein ad for perfume called Beauty \" border=\"0\" height=\"206\" src=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-KyYIiAVIAR0\/UBMJwxSf8MI\/AAAAAAAAA4c\/0DTKYlXVJnE\/s320\/c1f21a015cbb56b1_dianekruger_ckbeauty_ad_1.jpg\" title=\"calvin klein ad\" width=\"320\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/-XULRNeG2QIc\/UBMKD_bZfXI\/AAAAAAAAA4k\/j1bRiQ0Uz7g\/s1600\/covergirl.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg alt=\"cover girl ad for mascara\" border=\"0\" src=\"http:\/\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/-XULRNeG2QIc\/UBMKD_bZfXI\/AAAAAAAAA4k\/j1bRiQ0Uz7g\/s1600\/covergirl.jpg\" title=\"cover girl ad\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EBasically any \"personal care\" product you can think of, from hair brushes to tweezers, from firming lotion to after shave, depends on our belief that our beauty is flawed and that their product holds the repair.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EIn many occasions, entire industries are predicated on creating \"flaws\" just so the company can fix them. (Check out \u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/www.slate.com\/articles\/double_x\/doublex\/2011\/04\/the_cure_for_your_fugly_armpits.html\"\u003Ethis great article\u003C\/a\u003E from Slate that looks at the history of body-shaming to sell products.)\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EThere are plenty of companies that want us to think that \u003Cb\u003Emoney can buy love\u003C\/b\u003E:\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ctable align=\"center\" cellpadding=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" class=\"tr-caption-container\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ctbody\u003E\u003Ctr\u003E\u003Ctd style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-UjCZYOI4xdE\/UBMKy7Iw8kI\/AAAAAAAAA40\/Abzxh6JkaRI\/s1600\/Kay-Jewlers1-300x182.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"\u003E\u003Cimg alt=\"kay jewelers ad that says \u0026quot;Every kiss begins with Kay\u0026quot; over couple kissing\" border=\"0\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-UjCZYOI4xdE\/UBMKy7Iw8kI\/AAAAAAAAA40\/Abzxh6JkaRI\/s1600\/Kay-Jewlers1-300x182.jpg\" title=\"kayad\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/td\u003E\u003C\/tr\u003E\u003Ctr\u003E\u003Ctd class=\"tr-caption\" style=\"text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/td\u003E\u003C\/tr\u003E\u003C\/tbody\u003E\u003C\/table\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003ESome take it more literally than others:\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-FIsN-1Vph-Q\/UBML2l47H-I\/AAAAAAAAA48\/KXQ_PjUvjHw\/s1600\/eharmonyadgoof.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg alt=\"eHarmony ad with couple describing meeting their soul mate through the service\" border=\"0\" src=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-FIsN-1Vph-Q\/UBML2l47H-I\/AAAAAAAAA48\/KXQ_PjUvjHw\/s1600\/eharmonyadgoof.jpg\" title=\"eHarmony ad\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EWe even get (perhaps subtler) messages that \u003Cb\u003Emoney can buy friends\u003C\/b\u003E:\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"315\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/KjFuFvjBIFA\" width=\"560\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EBudweiser's tagline of \"Grab Some Buds\" exemplifies this theme. And, to some extent, there's truth in this message. After all, picture a party without any of the purchased party accouterments we've come to expect. We use things we purchase to make social events run smoothly.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EThere are even products whose entire marketing strategy exists around the idea that you can \u003Cb\u003Ebuy your way to an intangible experience\u003C\/b\u003E.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EConsider how Jeep has set itself up as a (commodified) way to access adventure:\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-Uu2y2FxeB-0\/UBMOB50qtQI\/AAAAAAAAA5E\/PCl7txiaryc\/s1600\/jeep-shadow-ad.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg border=\"0\" height=\"224\" src=\"http:\/\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-Uu2y2FxeB-0\/UBMOB50qtQI\/AAAAAAAAA5E\/PCl7txiaryc\/s320\/jeep-shadow-ad.jpg\" width=\"320\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"315\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/780ygVyt-II\" width=\"560\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003EOr how cities and states attempting to draw upon tourist dollars frame themselves as ways to purchase an experience:\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: left;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ciframe allowfullscreen=\"\" frameborder=\"0\" height=\"315\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/AYIQoyTretc\" width=\"560\"\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Ca href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-3_7zscVHNJ0\/UBMPF8o81cI\/AAAAAAAAA5M\/y552Dg2n_yo\/s1600\/4048e554f3003c1ccb847c6b1c0b918f6072b412.png.jpeg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"\u003E\u003Cimg border=\"0\" height=\"266\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-3_7zscVHNJ0\/UBMPF8o81cI\/AAAAAAAAA5M\/y552Dg2n_yo\/s320\/4048e554f3003c1ccb847c6b1c0b918f6072b412.png.jpeg\" width=\"320\" \/\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Ch3\u003E\u003Cspan class=\"Apple-style-span\" style=\"color: orange;\"\u003EWhat's It Mean for the American Dream?\u003C\/span\u003E\u003C\/h3\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003ESo, what's the answer? Can we buy happiness?\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EI don't know.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EI know that money opens up a lot of possibilities that not having money shuts down. I know that we live in a culture where the purchasing of certain products is practically a necessity if you want to access certain social circles. This works in ways that are fairly expected--you're going to have to buy a suit to go to certain parties or work in certain offices, for instance. But it also works in ways that might be more under-the-surface--if you want to be considered in with the \"hip\" mommy crowd, you're going to feel pressured to buy a certain stroller brand, for example. And those distinctions are not always about demonstrating a greater level of wealth. It can also be about choosing ethical products or fitting into a group on the fringe of mainstream society. At the end of the day, though, it takes money to access most of those things.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EI guess the real question for me is one of chicken-or-the-egg. Which came first? Did we start demanding niche products to set ourselves apart, or did companies start creating images of niche lifestyles to increase demand for more products?\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EWhile I suspect that companies--having more access to media outlets--have the upper hand in terms of power, I can't vilify them completely. We are a part of our culture, and we participate in the cycle. And I'm not even sure it's always a bad thing. After all, those products we buy, those things we create, they help us express ourselves and they employ people. (Plus, you know, Vegas is fun.) It's not always a simple equation.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003E\u003Cbr \/\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003Cdiv\u003EStill, I can't help but think that being bombarded with ads that tell us we can buy our way to \"the best things in life\" also work to reinforce an American Dream mythos that keeps us dependent on money. We're very invested in the economic definition of success, and the messages that undercut \"you can't buy happiness\" also prop up the American Dream at a place where it could be weakened and--quite rightfully--questioned.\u0026nbsp;\u003C\/div\u003E"},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/feeds\/1800438148132901104\/comments\/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/07\/money-cant-buy-happiness-lets-talk.html#comment-form","title":"1 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/1800438148132901104"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/feeds\/5827968588643415787\/posts\/default\/1800438148132901104"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http:\/\/www.balancingjane.com\/2012\/07\/money-cant-buy-happiness-lets-talk.html","title":"Money Can't Buy Happiness: Let's Talk About Money (Part 5)"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Michelle"},"uri":{"$t":"http:\/\/www.blogger.com\/profile\/07801229525416203656"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$image":{"rel":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail","width":"16","height":"16","src":"https:\/\/img1.blogblog.com\/img\/b16-rounded.gif"}}],"media$thumbnail":{"xmlns$media":"http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/","url":"http:\/\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-l6f2sUWqlYA\/UBKWsdBJCVI\/AAAAAAAAA34\/wjdxHvbdFK0\/s72-c\/money_cant_buy_happiness_tshirt-p235796837388370679bfn6a_400.jpg","height":"72","width":"72"},"thr$total":{"$t":"1"}}]}});